Monday Night Musings: Games, Kids, and Adults
Hi, my name is PixelPoet, and I was partially raised by videogames. Having three older brothers (and a younger sister) I was introduced to gaming at an early age. I still remember when my oldest brother saved up a whopping $200 to buy a NES. I remember getting Ice Climbers on the Christmas that followed thereafter. I also recollect my parents having to buy the NES from my brother so that we would stop having to fight/argue with him/each other as to who got to play. A few years later I got a Gameboy and shortly after became the main user of our SNES and most of the systems that followed. I spent many a day tied up in the 'game room' playing Secret of Mana, Final Fantasy 3, Chrono Trigger, and even original Super Mario Kart. In retrospect, I'm sure my mom was just elated that I was so easy to keep occupied while the other four siblings wrecked havoc upon the house with potbelly pig pets, real go-karts, and plenty of grunge music (ahh... the 90s). So yes, I was in part raised by videogames, and I'd like to think I turned out at least somewhat resembling something sane.
Now, I'm adult, and have nine nieces and nephews (and I'm sure plenty more on the way now that my younger sister is getting married in June). On Sunday I was actually playing Super Smash Bros. Brawl over the internet with my one brother and his two twin sons, both age six. It was fantastic and I was surprised to find my nephews often beating both my brother and I in our battles; however, this and many other incidents have made me realize that kids today are starting gaming and computing at a much younger age. I look how I was raised and don't see a problem, but then i see a story like "Ninten-Don't... How I watched my children turn into monsters the minute I bought them a computer game" (yes it's an incredibly long title) and wonder if maybe I'm wrong. Are video games destroying are children? Will they suffer personal identity loss in the future? Is there anything we can do? Won't someone please think of the children?!?!?! I think there is a solution... (Cheat sheet answers - No, No, Yes, and 'mmm forbidden donut')
Let me put in a little disclaimer here... I know I'm talking about kids and I also understand that there is a wide range of views on children in the gay-friendly community, but like them, love them, or hate them, kids are the people that will be changing our adult diapers in the nursing homes when we all live to be 100-something thanks to all the advances in medicine and technology; so I'd like them to be somewhat well-adjusted and capable. Disclaimer in place, I love kids and visiting my family is always fun since I get to play with my nieces and nephews for short burst of time without having to deal with all the downsides of having kids of my own. At the same time I've become the 'cool' uncle since I have two DSes that I take with me when traveling and now I often bring along Wii games for the kids to play as well.
While I've become the 'cool' uncle through my videogame wielding ways, at the same time I could also be seen as a pusher, since I was the first to introduce many of them to the Nintendo handheld and to the Wii. From my visits, my family now owns three DSes outside of my own two, and two of my brothers also have a Wii in their house; however, here's how my story and the one in the article quoted before differ, my brothers/sisters-in-law actually thank me for having introduced them and their kids to those gaming platforms. They talk about of the DSes are lifesavers during long trips in keeping the kids quiet, how much the kids learn from the educational computer games they play, and just how much fun they have playing Mario Party or Wii Sports as a family. I'm sure there are some arguments at times as to who gets to play, and I know that the kids have even hid my DS once or twice from me while visiting; nevertheless, the same happened in my house growing up, and it happens in thousands of households that don't even have videogames. This is not some strange new phenomena, it's just a new twist on an old idea.
In the end, it all comes down to good/bad parenting and not to video games being innately evil. Sure, people can get addicted to videogames, people can also get addicted to bananas, but you don't see anyone lambasting potassium for it. Discipline, exercise, extra-curricular activities, and incentives are what makes the difference between videogames dominating a child's life and them being a part of a kid's 'happy' childhood. I mean parents are as bad at abusing the videogame habit as kids are, so clearly the issue is not so much age as it is how parents are regulating the use in their own households.
Nonetheless, no matter how much I get up on my soapbox and preach that the sky is not falling, I can't change people from saying the opposite. What can I do? Well I just try and help those that are around me to see the joys and excitement that videogames can bring to people of all ages, while at the same time making sure that everyone keeps their fun on a safe level. At the same time I think I'll go invest some money in a few videogame stocks... might as well make a penny of my pushing as well (I kid)
How does everyone else feel on the issue? Am I on the money? Way off mark? Completely inept at trying to convey any message with meaning? Feel free to tell me any and/or all of the above in the comments below, I always enjoy reading your responses.
PixelPoet
Posted to Hot Stuff, Miscellany on 5 May 2008
· Comments (5)
Other stuff like this: discipline, kids, monday night musings, parents
I for one think you're absolutely correct. There is a way of using and a way of abusing videogames just like anything else. Nothing ruins our youth as long as parents do their parenting job.
I remember back in school the curriculum demanded the lecture of "Die Leiden des jungen Werther", a novel by Goethe. Pretty standard fare when you're studying german, one of the most commonly read lectures by Jay Dubya. However, delving a little deeper into the circumstances surrounding its release, I found out that back when it was first published, it caused a wave of suicides modeled after the one committed by the protagonist of the novel. Most victims were rich, young men, living, as the protagonist did, off their parents money and being literally bored to death.
I think this still stands as a prime example of how blaming the medium is just a way of denying responsibility for how your child grows up. IF you rely on any medium, not only videogames, but also TV, books, anything, to raise your children, you WILL still be solely responsible for the outcome. Not the games are to blame. You are.
I know this may sound high and mighty coming from someone w/o kids of his own, and a godson barely able to walk, let alone play video games. But I was young, too, and I am still grateful for my parents keeping an eye on what I watched, played and read. Nothing in the world can replace that.
I'm eternally thankful that I won't ever have to bother raising kids, but even if I did somehow take leave of my sanity and decide I wanted to have any (via adoption/surrogate/whatever), I'd like to think that I'd be able to raise them and not simply sit them in front of the computer or TV and let the electronic babysitters do the work.
Stupid lady, of course SEVERAL kids will inevitably quarrel over ONE handheld..
Sibling fighting is a natural occurrance, it's going to happen over one issue or another regardless of parental effort. Parents have a hard time accepting that their own children are anything but the "perfect angels" they were raised to be, so when that fighting happens they want to look for some evil "thing" that cuased the fighting and condemn it. Truth is, sibling fighting is a natural part of child development as part of the child's need to test the boundries of the world around them. As long as the parent disciplines the child for their negative behavior, then the child will learn their lesson and in the future avoid that kind of sibling fighting. On the contrary though, if the parent blames some outside source, like a videogame, then the child will learn no fault of their own and continue the behavior.
You are absolutely right, it's all about parenting, and how situations are handled.
The mother from that article is completly bonkers - it's so easy to tell, look at her own words: "Gabriel became obsessed with playing the football game Fifa 08: over meals, on the loo, in bed at midnight."
What on Earth was she doing, letting her kids play during meals and in the middle of the night? She was practically encouraging their behaviour, for pity's sake!
My sister and I had 1 console to share between the 2 of us growing up, and we never fought over it. We did, however, fight over who got to hold the leash when we walked the dog, and a couple shared books - should our parents have gotten rid of the dog and our books, instead of encouraging us to be civil and teaching us how to share? Sheesh.