Vote For 'Worst Toy Of The Year,' Chance To Win Even Worse Toy

I admit, I wasn't entirely certain whether GamePolitics was kidding me when I saw the nominations for this year's TOADY awards, which include a Barbie Digital Nail Printer as well as more videogame-related products, which range from HALO toys to a cubicle & LCD combo called the Little Tikes Young Explorer.

The Campaign for a Commercial-Free Childhood sponsors the TOADY (Toys Oppressive and Destructive to Young Children) awards annually, and voters register for a chance to win one of four beyond-boring healthy toys. Well, three healthy toys and something called the 'Wooden Super Rainbow Tunnel,' which while commercial-free does sound kind of awesomely subversive.

Regular readers are probably expecting a filthy 'super rainbow tunnel' joke right about now. But we - or at least yours tinily - would never take a moment meant to be all about healthy childhood fun and ruin it with a crass comment about that summer I made $5,000 tricking out my own super rainbow 'tunnel' - no way, no how! We save that stuff for the podcast. Usually.

Here are the more game-tangential nominees:

• AddictingGames.com - "The games at Nickelodeon's AddictingGames.com have it all: lechery... gratuitous violence... and even animal cruelty. But it's not the exciting content that makes Addicting Games so TOADYish; It's Nick's decision to promote - and link to - the site on every page of its websites for preschoolers like NickJr.com and Neopets."

• Little Tikes Young Explorer - "The Young Explorer's cubicle design keeps tots' eyes glued firmly on the 19-inch flat screen monitor by eliminating pesky distractions, like the outside world."

• HALO United Nations Space Command Turret - "You already own the most popular videogame franchise of all time, with hundreds of millions of dollars in sales. Want to increase profits even more? Market your game to young children!"

• EyeClops Mini Projector - "Is there any greater threat to screen time than summer? All those picnics, trips to the beach, and playing outside until the sun goes down. Well now, thanks to JAKKS Pacific, the whole world is a screen! The portable EyeClops Mini Projector allows kids to project movies, TV shows, and video games anywhere they want..."

Vote before May 10 for a chance to win wooden crap. I mean super fun and healthy crap. I mean super fun and healthy toys. Sheesh, how do the folks at the CCFC stay serious about this stuff all day long? Better question: who buys their kid a friggin' cubicle?

Ok, it's kind of cute in a Fisher-Price meets Office Space kind of way, but still.