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Same-Sex Romance Blooms In Gears Of War 3

gears april fools.png

In a stunning twist, Cliffy B has confirmed that two of the most iconic hyper-masculine videogame characters will venture out of the proverbial closet for the first time in Gears of War 3.

"I'm really proud of what the team has done for Gears of War 3," Cliffy B said in a dream I had last night. "There's been a lot of speculation about Marcus and Dom over the years, and in Gears of War 3 all of those questions will be answered. But not how most fans expect."

According to the Jazz Jackrabbit creator, it will be Augustus Cole, not Dom, who will get to cross lancers with series leading man Marcus Fenix in Gears of War 3.

"It just makes sense that way," continued the vision of Cliffy B in my fever-dream. "We wanted to add real depth to our characters. Sure, Cole's character has been a one-dimensional, and often offensive, stereotype up until this point in the series, but he's wearing a pretty heavy mask. As a former Thrashball player turned military man, Cole is constantly weighed down by the man he thinks society wants him to be. He's been hiding within himself. Heck, under the intense pressure of the locust invasion, all of the COGs have been hiding inside themselves. Gears of War 3 won't just be about liberating the planet Sera from the locust, each COG will also liberate themselves from roles and personalities the machine of society prescribed them."

With the romance between Marcus and Dom so prevalent in the first two Gears of War games, many gamers may wonder about the switch in romantic focus for Gears 3.

"Of course they still love each other, they always will. But remember, Dom's wife has just died. Marcus has too much respect for their friendship to take advantage of Dom in his emotionally vulnerable state. that isn't to say their romance is completely dead though, and the budding couple of Marcus and Cole may bring out a side of Dom not yet seen in the series."

Be sure to check your calendars for more exciting announcements about Gears of War 3.

Seriously, check your calendars.

14 Comments

benwa said:

So April Fools !!! ? I will so buy this game if this turns out real!

Gamerock10 said:

Oh, how i wish this weren't an April Fool's joke. I'd pre-order this game in a heartbeat and play it non-stop! :)

Gogoedward said:

I just like that we have a Cliffy B tag.

Pauwow said:

Waaaaay to good to be true, eitherway I never liked this game, the whole Alpha Male thing is so exagerated that I just can't stop laughing in the dramatic moments, I guess that's the reason they use the "Unreal" engine right? nobody?! XD

12thGay said:

I had my credit card ready, too.

Branovices said:

Happy April Fool's Day! When I woke up and turned on the computer, navigated here and saw that headline... well, it just immediately reminded me of the date, hehe.

Caracticus said:

Oh, they're already gay in my mind. VERY Gay. In love. They've settled down in a brownstone in New Greenwich Village in New New New York, and the entire basement is a playroom with a sling and a mattress with a rubber bedsheet on it.

And they invite their friends Master Chief and Patrick Galloway from "Undying" and Nathan Drake and all the rest. Oh, and Corso from "Titan A.E." just for good measure. And that extra kinky dude, Issac Clarke from Dead Space.

Hijinks ensue and everyone loses about half a pound of bodily fluids in about an hour and smiles a lot and is only there to provide pleasure to one another, after eliminating all those aliens or ghosts or ghost aliens or whatever they are so our freedoms will be preserved.

And this just goes on and on for ever, because they never age for some reason.

deadwasp said:

Aww, man. This was a good one! it definitely fooled me for a while. lol I kinda hate that series, but I would've soooo changed my mind if this turned out to be true.

matty said:

Ok, this is just cruel. That would have been so awesome to have had.

raindog469 said:

I know it's April Fool's Day and all, but this plot twist just seems kinda.... well.... redundant. Like "Ellen" redundant.

MBP said:

@ Caracticus

Would you possibly mind fleshing out that story? For uh.. research purposes.

fauxfaia said:

@Caracticus

...go on...

benwa said:

if he won't I can lend a hand in finishing it off

Klarth said:

LMAO. You got me good. I had forgotten what day it was, and I was like WUT?
All of a sudden I was curious about GoW. Well played.
;-P

And girls who like girls who like rumble packs!

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Klarth on Same-Sex Romance Blooms In Gears Of War 3: LMAO. You got me good. I had forgotten what day it was, and I was like WUT? All of a...

benwa on Same-Sex Romance Blooms In Gears Of War 3: if he won't I can lend a hand in finishing it off...

fauxfaia on Same-Sex Romance Blooms In Gears Of War 3: @Caracticus ...go on......

MBP on Same-Sex Romance Blooms In Gears Of War 3: @ Caracticus Would you possibly mind fleshing out that story? For uh.. research purposes....

raindog469 on Same-Sex Romance Blooms In Gears Of War 3: I know it's April Fool's Day and all, but this plot twist just seems kinda.... well.... redundant. Like "Ellen" redundant....

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