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Wootini's Weekly Animal Crossing Diary


Dear Diary,

Things are heating up in Narnia, and not just because of the weather! Although to be fair, the weather has brought out the bugs... and I can't stand them. Especially those giant moths that you don't actually see until you get right next to the tree and then they fly off flapping their giant wings and it scares you half to death! Phew! We should call an exterminator or put bug zappers on all the trees or something...


I don't actually know what pond my parents went for a dip in, but I keep imagining that it's only like, a foot deep and they just kind of waded around in the mud. Yes, that's what I think of my parents. I mean, look at that letter! When she sat down to write it, she still had mud in her toes! She doesn't even know enough to clean herself up afterwards! For all I know, the mud is still there!


Being the beginning of the month, I got the next item in the golden series, this golden man. The letter said: "Does this item resemble a piece of chocolate that's wrapped in foil? Luckily, though, it won't melt in the summer heat!" Um, no, not exactly. It looks like a golden idol in a vaguely mannish shape with flames coming out of his head. It's super awesome, though! I love it! Doesn't really go with my Christmas tree, but whatever!


Derwin opened up to me a little bit about his career goals. I'd love it if he could make some good comic books, because right now, they're not that great. Of course, he was about to tell me one of his ideas, but then changed his mind. I thought it was because he didn't want me to steal it, but turns out he was just afraid I wouldn't like it. I bet I would. It couldn't be any worse than the dreck Marvel and DC are putting out right now!


Shockingly, shortly after Derwin talked comics with me, I ran into him gain on the other side of town, and he came running over to tell me that he was thinking about moving! Seriously? Didn't I already have to talk you down from this ledge once before? Anyway, I tried to ask him not to go, and he said that he didn't think he could get out of it... but he promised to try! He'd better try his little beak off, or I won't be buying any of his comic books when they come out!

And girls who like girls who like rumble packs!

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