Like an angry stepfather, verbal abuse of the most hurtful sort has come to define the existence of my humble graphics card. Yet no amount of macaroni drawings (i.e. being able to run Doom III on medium settings), nor a sea of binary tears can make up for the fact that it is, at its machine heart, a loser. Indeed, as
my father a wise old sage once said: "Son, there are exceptional people in this world - those seemingly chosen by fate to do great things. You are not one of those people. No, you're going to leave this world the same way you entered it: a screaming baby."
Best illustrating its most recent failings, we have Crytek's latest tech demo, showcasing the prowess of the CryEngine SDK 3.4 update. Utilizing the digital might of DX11, the video features beautifully detailed character models, stunning environments, and water featuring little flourishes, such as foam - foam, for Christ's sake. Overall, I was most impressed with the demo. While Crytek is known for its stunning visuals (immortalized in the words "but can it run Crysis?" which certainly didn't make me want to punch the internet after reading it for the 47th time), I was pleased with the refinement in CryEngine 3.4. Of particular note is the smoothing of character models' facial features - something that, while definitely a step above previous generations, is often still present in modern games.
So there you go. Since your Monday has been dreadful enough, I'll spare you the harrowing peek into the future that Crytek and their peers are creating. Granted, graphics will inevitably become so advanced as to reduce reality to some kind of subjective concept - thus treating a whole generation to what will one day be called "gaming-induced psychosis" - but we'll brush that under the rug for the time being. So while you sit in your respective chairs, comfortable and un-murdered by friends that believe you have the enemy flag, enjoy the loveliness of CryEngine 3.4!