Once in a great while, there comes a game so grand - so awash in ball-rending epicness - that it can bring to mind only one thing: America. Such is the case of Metal Wolf Chaos, a harrowing portrait of a world in which "freedom was dead," and the fate of the country seems irrevocably bleak.
To remedy this, the player must see the Defense Department's "secret nuclear death robot" program (or something along those lines) manifested in the most glorious way: emerging from the Oval office amidst a wave of fire, piloted by the only man capable of such a patriotic undertaking: The President of the United States, Barack Obama Michael Wilson. An relatively obscure Xbox title, Metal Wolf Chaos can run in upwards of $200 online.
Guiding us on this digital odyssey are Matt and Pat, of the Machinima series, "Two Best Friends Play." Over the course of twenty,
coke-addled spirited minutes, our intrepid, yell-y duo give us a sonic tour through the fertile, fruited plains of liberty. And freedom. And railguns.
Now some of you might say, "MWC is quite obviously satirical. The jingoistic, hyper-nationalistic silliness is little more than that - complete with straight-faced quotes, such as "the fight will continue, as long as the America inside my heart is still alive" - taken seriously only by right-wing dullards of such magnitude, and such farcical determination, as to make the Glenn Beck forum community look like a Nader meetup group." Rather than justifying such freedom-hating nonsense, I will simply defer to the wise words of Thomas Jefferson: "Shut up, you f*cking p*ssy."
Metal Wolf Chaos: Like Ronald Reagan riding an eagle made of flags, bullets, and pure American grit.